I went to the farmers’ market today and found one of the vendors is no longer there because the government is protecting me from them. It was a lady that I bought eggs from and she also provided food from the local Amish community. That latter part is apparently illegal. You know those Amish! They might run over your cellphone with their wagon. These people are dangerous! Aren’t you glad for our beloved government? HAIL VICTORY!

Dorothy-Jane, I love you and so very much miss you!