I put on some nice dress pants that I bought about 10 years ago. The typical story is the older guy no longer fits in his younger pants. Unless I wear a belt, they simply drop to the floor since they are so loose. I did not become the fat old guy that your dad once suggested, but am probably healthier then I have ever been.

I took a short 6 mile hike today, making two quick stops at two stores. It took only 90 minutes. Saying that I walk fast is an understatement. I am in excellent health and it is reasonable to think I will outlive my dad. You once wrote something like that it would have been the Lord’s mercy if I had died when I had a mild heart attack. The opposite has happened. Skin issues that I have had in the past are gone. Things like lower back pain are gone. My endurance is very high when walking and 10 miles is now a short hop. My stomach is as firm as or firmer than when I was swimming. So unless accelerated, I might be available to you for decades to come.

While there is willingness on my part to reconcile, it seems you have slammed the door shut. Man’s laws seems to mean nothing as you have kept me from our kids for over two years. The Lord’s commands, including 1Co7:11 which is directly to you, also seem to mean nothing. Mark 10 and Romans 7 and so many other places seem to be ignored by your dad, and you seem to be following in line.

However, the Lord’s grace abounds and I have seen it so often in my life and in many around me. It is the trust in the Lord’s grace to us that I place my hope. So let me be very clear. I have been using the simple summary that marriage is defined by sex and ends with death and contending with a growing crowd that the Scripture demonstrates this is true. I am committed to living that for the rest of my days, and letting you, our kids, and the world know. While we are both alive, it is the Lord’s command that we are one and only death will end that. So in obedience to the Lord and because I really love you, I will live that. But I will go one step further. Since I am in such good health, the possibility is very real that I could outlive you. So I will restate the commitment I made long ago. You are the one and only lady in my life. If I become free, I will never pursue another. Once you have the best, there is no point in ever compromising. It is you and you alone for all my days. You need to know this. Our kids need to know this. Since I am blocked from communicating with them, my plan is to share it with the world in video form as a birthday gift to you. Last year’s video did become popular.

There seems to be evidence that you were more attracted to the money that I can make than the man I am or my effort to following in the Lord’s commands. There are so many ways for me today to make serious money, but as I have matured, I see how so many ways I can but are not in obedience to the Lord. So I am pressing on with things that are high risk, and I’m not speaking monetarily, because I have matured as a follower of the Lord Jesus Christ. If that kind of man ever becomes attractive to you, I’m here for you alone.

Please don’t raise our kids to follow the world, as clearly is occurring. Raise them to know that the Scripture is true, they can verify that if they desire, the Lord’s commands are very hard as the cost of following them, the cost of offering love, is tribulation, persecution, and chastisement. Don’t raise our kids to be cowards, a term that I have used in dialog with your dad more than once. Raise our kids to be followers of Christ. Show them what grace does. Start with 1Co7:11. You have a willing man seeking reconciliation without retribution available to you.

Today’s email is being shared with our kids. I know it is ignored, but perhaps one day someone will wonder why the dad’s attempt at reconciliation was avoided.

Please also remember that I make a monthly PDF of this email and put it online with the voicemails. It is public and today’s email will be at: http://family.kozlowski.org/Voicemail-2018-11-30

Dorothy-Jane, I love you!